{"id":6414,"date":"2011-05-01T00:11:06","date_gmt":"2011-04-30T22:11:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.javi.it\/?p=6414"},"modified":"2011-05-01T00:11:06","modified_gmt":"2011-04-30T22:11:06","slug":"feliz-dia-a-todas-las-madres","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.javi.it\/?p=6414","title":{"rendered":"Feliz d\u00eda a todas las madres"},"content":{"rendered":"<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Y lo se lo quiero dedicar <strong>especialmente a la m\u00eda<\/strong> con este correo que me enviaron hace unos d\u00edas y que he presentado en este diario:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><a title=\"Pinche para agrandar\" rel=\"lightbox\" href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.javi.it\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/04\/feliz-dia-de-la-madre1.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.javi.it\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/04\/feliz-dia-de-la-madre1.jpg?resize=400%2C585\" alt=\"\" width=\"400\" height=\"585\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><strong>-Y otro un poco mas jocoso:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Todo lo que siempre necesit\u00e9 saber, lo aprend\u00ed de mi Madre:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 a APRECIAR UN TRABAJO BIEN HECHO:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;Si os vais a matar, hacerlo afuera. Acabo de terminar de limpiar!&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 RELIGION:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;Reza para que esta mancha salga de la alfombra.&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 RAZONAMIENTO:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;Porque yo lo digo, por eso&#8230; y punto!!!!&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 PREVISI\u00d3N:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;Aseg\u00farate de que llevas ropa interior limpia, por si tienes un accidente.&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 IRONIA:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;T\u00fa sigue llorando, ver\u00e1s como te doy una raz\u00f3n para que llores de \u00a0 \u00a0verdad.&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 a ser AHORRATIVO:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;Gu\u00e1rdate las l\u00e1grimas para cuando yo me muera!!!&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 OSMOSIS:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;Cierra la boca y come!!!!!&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 CONTORSIONISMO:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;\u00a1Mira la suciedad que tienes en la nuca, vu\u00e9lvete!&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 FUERZA Y VOLUNTAD:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;Te vas a quedar sentado hasta que te comas todo.&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1o METEOROLOGIA:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;Parece que ha pasado un hurac\u00e1n por tu cuarto.&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 VERACIDAD:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;\u00a1\u00a1Te he dicho un mill\u00f3n de veces que no seas exagerado!!&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 MODIFICACION DE PATRONES DEL COMPORTAMIENTO:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;Deja de actuar como tu padre!!!!!&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 habilidades como VENTRILOQUIA:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;No me rezongues, c\u00e1llate y cont\u00e9stame: \u00bfpor que lo hiciste?&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 LENGUAJE ENCRIPTADO<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;No me, no me&#8230; \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0que te, que te&#8230;&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 t\u00e9cnicas de ODONTOLOGIA:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;Me vuelves a contestar y te estampo los dientes contra la pared!!!&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 GEOGRAF\u00cdA DE ESPA\u00d1A:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;\u00a1Como sig\u00e1is as\u00ed os voy a mandar a uno a C\u00e1diz y al otro a La Coru\u00f1a!&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 BIOLOG\u00cdA:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;\u00a1Tienes menos cerebro que un mosquito!&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 L\u00d3GICA:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;Mam\u00e1, \u00bfqu\u00e9 hay de comer?&#8221; \u00a1COMIDA!&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">-Mi madre me ense\u00f1\u00f3 RECTITUD:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8216;Te voy a enderezar de un tortazo!!!&#8217;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">\u00a1\u00a1\u00a1GRACIAS MAMA!!!&#8230;. \u00a0 \u00a0Madre<br \/>\nsolo hay una&#8230;.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><strong>Feliz d\u00eda de la madre!!!<\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Gracias Asun por el correo. Espero que pronto puedas celebrarlo t\u00fa.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><a title=\"Acceder\" href=\"http:\/\/www.fodey.com\/generators\/newspaper\/snippet.asp\" target=\"_blank\">Web con la que puedes presentar un texto en un peri\u00f3dico.<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Y lo se lo quiero dedicar especialmente a la m\u00eda con este correo que me [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_bbp_topic_count":0,"_bbp_reply_count":0,"_bbp_total_topic_count":0,"_bbp_total_reply_count":0,"_bbp_voice_count":0,"_bbp_anonymous_reply_count":0,"_bbp_topic_count_hidden":0,"_bbp_reply_count_hidden":0,"_bbp_forum_subforum_count":0,"_s2mail":"","spay_email":"","jetpack_publicize_message":""},"categories":[187],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v14.9 - 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